It's happening.
Class is now in session, and I am full swing into the completion of the last two courses that, should I complete them successfully, will make me a graduate. This looooonnnnnnnggggg journey towards a Masters of Divinity with a Pastoral major will be done. Completed. Accomplished.
But not yet. Not quite.
With being registered for only two courses, I am still well in the 'part time studies' category. And I have no end of respect for my fellow students who are, at this very moment, heroically attempting to carry a full course load of four, and even five credits this semester alone.
I'm only doing two. So, believe me, as 'much' as this feels to me, I'm not pretending to try to impress anyone. Honest. Especially when you consider that I've been at this for two decades by now. Not kidding. Started this thing in fall 2002. So....yeah, no awards for speed here.
That's why so many people keep asking, aren't you done that degree yet? Well friends, almost. Almost.
Feels weird to be able to see the finish line ahead at last.
Has me thinking and reflecting on a few things.
I don't regret the pacing of this.
What a long and drawn-out, no-bragging way to get your education, right? Twenty years for a three year program? Who does that? I did, and, while at times it has been a tad embarrassing, I'm not sorry.
For one, it reflects the priorities of my life. Sometimes, all I could manage was one course a year, because I was serving as full time senior pastor to a beautiful congregation that deserved my good attention. Unlike other probably more gifted and intelligent pastor/students who could make different choices, I just knew the limits of my capacity and balanced it out accordingly. Sometimes I had to sit out for three semesters in a row, because I knew I couldn't be a good student AND a good daughter to my aging parents. Sometimes the delays were financial, and I don't regret one penny of those redirection of funds to more pressing matters of life and ministry at the time.
But even more, there has been huge value - huge! - in learning and practicing at the same time. Sort of this dual track of adult learning that allowed for real time application with very little of the academics falling into wasteful cracks of irrelevance. Most programs require field education components and internships anyways. This whole thing was the ultimate in that hands-on learning experience.
On top of that, taking my time has allowed for so much more targeted study in specialized Directed Reading and Research credits where I was allowed to dig deep into areas of passion and incorporate actual ministry work into the learning process. In this, I greatly benefitted from the personal supervision of professors who are actual practitioners in their fields, and who demonstrated a genuine interest in my learning. In am indebted.
And it took a very long time.
To be honest, had I known when I started in 2002 that it would take until 2022 to complete it, I could have been tempted to look out over that daunting stretch and declare it 'too long' a commitment to get my degree. But, had that been the case, and I didn't launch into this then, right now, it would still be 2022 and I wouldn't have my degree. So there's that.
There's more going on in these almost-done reflections of my heart, but perhaps that's best saved for future posts closer to when I'm actually going to be able to say I'm really and truly done.
For now, maybe just an encouragement to anyone facing something that seems like it will never be over. Your own academic pursuits, maybe. Or perhaps a mountain of debt you are chipping away at, bit by bit. Maybe even in parenting, especially if you have younger children who aren't letting you sleep much and it feels like you've signed up for a life of chronic exhaustion.
Don't give up. Find your tenacity and resilience. Hang on to your purpose. For me, of course, this all connects to the deep belief that God's plans and purposes for my life can't be thwarted.
"The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O LORD, endures forever. Do not forsake the work of your hands." Psalm 138:8 (ESV)
But that's part of what I think I want to save for another time.
Gotta go. The reading alone for this semester is making sure I don't coast out at the end :).
And oh. As a point of interest that I happen to think is kind of fun. If I graduate in May I will be just under the wire to graduate before I turn 65 in June! Love that!
