Operation Normalization

And so begins the re-entry.

By this point, just shy of 48 hours back, I'd say I'm feeling surprisingly fantastic.  Woke up way too early Saturday morning (like about 2:30 or so), but was able to use the time to unpack and do laundry and just quietly make my way through the normal tasks of returning.  Sorting things out, putting things back where I need them to be for my regular life, preparing for the 'on-purpose-lightly-scheduled' week ahead.

Even at the wedding I officiated yesterday, all went well.  Buoyed by a short nap earlier in the day, I was very glad that the ceremony unfolded glitch-free, and that the conversation at the table afterward was thoroughly enjoyable.

Good bye prayer time, sending us off.

This morning I woke up to the happy realization that I had actually slept all the way through to 4:30 a.m., which is close enough to my normal time of rising to be a very good indication indeed.  I made my normal breakfast smoothie.  I took my vitamins.  I have come over to the church early, even though I have no responsibilities this morning, just to sort through the mound of paper (pictures and cards) produced by the children for me to pass on to their beloved sponsors. 

Just now, I spent a blissfully-quiet 45 minutes resuming my normal pattern of reading and meditation, sitting in my chair, with the candle on.  Felt good and life-giving to be drinking in deeply of the solitude and contemplation.  Soon the worship band will arrive and I will hear them warming up, preparing for the service that will happen later on.  It will be delightful to see all my Highview 'peeps' and be filled by our time of worshiping God together.  I absolutely love being taught by Bill Webb, and am grateful that I am not required to preach this morning.

After that I will go home and have my normal Sunday afternoon nap.  Then spend the evening quietly with my generous husband, all in the familiar sweetness of all the things I love about my life.

And it's all going amazingly well this time.

Until just about a minute ago when I received a voice message via Facebook.  Suradet has figured out how to do that on his phone.   Unwittingly, I press play.  And for a long and heart-sore 17 seconds, the normalcy is gone.

Thai Sunrise

He's speaking Thai and just the sound of the language and the sound of his voice catches me back to the place where everything is so sensationally not normal.   He asks if Canada is cold?  He says that all the children are missing us and thinking of Ken as well (whom he calls 'father Ken').  He thanks God and ends with 'God bless you.'

I don't mind the tears.  I know they are witness to the beauty of the bond God has allowed to form between us.  I know they are part of the cost of loving like you won't get hurt, but you do, and it does.  And I know the normalcy will return in it's own time.

Body, mind, soul.  That's the order of it.  That's how we come back.  And it's happening easily and happily this time....mostly :). 

Fun

I think this trip will be best remembered for the laughter.

No question there were learnings and challenges and moments of dealing with bugs (frenzied writhing ones that fell into your food at the outdoor restaurant!).  There was the heat and humidity (although not as bad as other visits).  There were strange moments when the cultural clash bumped against Western sensibilities, and language still to be learned made for confusion and the need for much 'gring-jai'.

There was the work of teaching flute lessons and morning and evening devotions and putting together a Canadian Thanksgiving service, and preaching at the prison.

There was the concern for Yupa's Mom who suffered a mild stroke while we were there, and the meaningful time of worship and prayer we had at her house, just to gather around her and show our support and love.

But mostly it was fun.  Just fun, and funny.  A lot of the time.  Fake poo and wrong-way climbs up escalators (see previous post for details :).  Badly translated menus that invited you to try 'crap stick', and which provided Suradet and Yupa with just as much hilarity.  Games that included powder on the face and a classic well timed response from Fruk.  Gestures that would be considered highly offensive to farangs, but when made by a diminutive Thai child in a completely different context for a completely different reason, and you just have to laugh out loud.  The extra layer of humour that comes when a gentle Thai translator attempts sarcasm.   Wading ankel deep through the flash flood in the pouring rain - I mean really pouring - back to the car with three of us - Yupa, Esther and me - under a towel that's quickly getting saturated, and laughing like fools.  And - speaking of fools - spontaneous dance parties that get videoed and posted on Facebook.

So much fun. 

They say you're making real inroads into a culture when you can successfully tell a joke.  I would take that one step further and say that you're actually becoming family when hilarious stories are created in the context of togetherness. 

I will take the warm of that fun with me into many months ahead.  Gratefully.

And Now For Something Entirely Different

We've had yet another amazing day at Hot Springs, very conscious now of Thursday being departure day.  Makes everything slow down and become more 'present' somehow.

But since I don't really want to think about that....thought I'd just relay two fun stories.

Got called over with some urgency to the baptismal pool yesterday morning, before people started to arrive.  The children were dismayed and wanted to show me that it looked like a dog had done his business in the pool.  Sure enough, floating there was a fair-sized portion of, um, doggy doo.

I expressed my own dismay and horror, and indicated with some energy, the need to get that out of there!  Quick, find a stick!  Call Ahjahn Suradet!  We're definitely going to need to drain the pool and fill it up again, but do we have time?  Yuck!  Apparently, my reaction was quite amusing, since the children were laughing so hard.

That's when Fruk calmly reached in and scooped out the offensive floater with his bare hands.  Bigger reaction from Ahjahn Ruth.  More laughing.  And then Fruk couldn't in good conscience torment me any longer and revealed the truth.  Fake poo.

Fake poo?  Where does a rural Thai boy get fake poo?

I didn't take a picture.  You're welcome.

Second story.

It was market night and usually what works best is to do supper in Chiang Mai first.  We'd been promised pizza, but when the first place ended up being take out only, we made our way to one of Chiang Mai's newest and biggest malls.  I'm talking six stories high.  Of course this modern facility comes complete with escalators, which, for some rural Thais are novel at best and terrifying at worst.  Suradet tells me his father, a mountain man (some eight hour drive away), refuses to set foot on one.

Suradet himself is comfortable enough in the city.  He was born in the same village where his parents still live.  But living now just 45 minutes out of Chiang Mai, he's been exposed to all the conveniences of modern life.  Except maybe he isn't as experienced on escalators as he first let on.

We were looking for a bathroom and had decided it was one floor down.  Suradet led the way and had just got on the escalator when Yupa realized that, no, there was a bathroom just over there on the floor we were on currently.   The rest of us had not yet stepped on the escalator.

Suradet, on his way down looked up, eyes wide.  He had a split-second decision to make.  Do I continue to go down and come back up, or am I still close enough to come back up the cascading downward stairs? 

To me he was too far gone.  No question, I would have done the circuit.  Not Suradet.  He decided to go for it.  Chugging bravely against the flow, he high-stepped his way back up to the top.  Big smile and a 'tada' kind of expression when he got there.  Except, Yupa and Bao had hurried away, not wanting anyone to know that this guy was with them.  A few onlookers did indeed seem rather unimpressed. 

I so wish I had a video.  Honestly, it was hilarious. It's these kinds of unexpected joyful moments that make the memories and make us family.

I warned him that this was too fun a story not to share with Highview.  And now I have :). 

How Can It Get Better Than This?

 This morning, just before all the wonderful began, I stepped out onto the small porch of Suradet and Yupa's home, having finished my final notes for the Thanksgiving service that was to start in about 30 minutes or so.  As is common, an English worship CD was playing in the sanctuary, loud enough to be heard almost anywhere on the property.  And I recognized the song as Everything, by Lifehouse.

How can I stand here with You and not be moved by You?
Would You tell me, how could it be any better than this?

A wash of profound gratitude came over me, and I just stopped to soak in the unexpected moment of worship, looking out over all the buildings and lush green of Hot Springs.  All this place represents in terms of God's goodness and guidance and sovereignty and passion for those who have no voice.....  Yes, how could it get any better than this?

And that was BEFORE the service!

It was two and a half hours of abundance.  If a church service were a meal, this was a Thanksgiving feast, without question.  Prayer time, all out worship in our voices, special renditions on the flute by Esther's young students, a dance number by some of the girls, and special numbers by Miki and Two, and our visiting university students.  Esther spoke through our interpreter about the pressures of choosing a career path in music, and followed that with a stunning flute solo.  Sermon was about Luke 17:11-19 and the nine that didn't come back to say thank you.

We handed out banana muffins in lieu of pumpkin pie (no such thing in Thailand, and you learn to improvise rather broadly here ;).  Then we all headed downstairs for the baptism of five people who were ready to make public their commitment to faith in Jesus.

In an act of utter selflessness, Suradet, who had done ALL the shepherding and discipling of these candidates, offered me the honour of actually doing the baptisms.   To keep everyone in attendance (which doesn't happen, Suradet says, when we truck out to the water reserve) Suradet had purchased a small child's pool.  That's where the baptisms took place.  

The five newly baptized souls are Porn and Pook, two women from the church, and Kratae, Porn, and Da, three of our own girls. [Just because I'm sure you're wondering, Porn means 'blessing' in Thai :)]

So tell me, how does it get any better than this?

When you dedicate your life, your vocation, your energies and passions to something, and you get to see it actually happening; when you work hard, sometimes without encouragement, sometimes against criticism and personal attack; when you just lay it all down and leave it in the hands of a God you believe to be wise, and sovereign and good, just one day like this can be all you need to make you believe your life makes sense.

Today my life makes sense.

And it just doesn't get any better than that.

 Lifehouse - Everything Lyrics | MetroLyrics

A Quick Sampling of Daily Life at Hot Springs

 Way too tired to blog tonight.  Will try tomorrow.  Meanwhile....here's what happens around Hot Springs during October school break :).

Jailhouse Sermons

Sometimes Jesus shows up in the most unlikely of places.

I felt that way two years ago, the first time I visited the women's correctional institute in Chiang Mai.  Within these walls there are about 120 women who have responded to God's invitation to new life and forgiveness through Jesus, because of the faithful, life-giving presence of Pastor Suradet and Yupa, and another pastor friend of theirs, Pastor Pic-Chai. 

About once a month they drive the 45 minutes into Chiang Mai, subject themselves to the security checks, and spend two hours with some of the most peaceful, delightful women you'd ever want to meet.

I had the enormous privilege of visiting with them again today.

Like last time, they sang us in.  It's a surreal experience.  Behind barbed wire and bars, voices echoing against the bare gray walls and floor, their strong unison and rhythmic clapping can be heard first from a distance and then growing louder until you turn the corner and come into the open space where they sit, row on row, smile on smile.  Their joy saturates the room.

Thinking over the day, yes, I'm glad for the sense that I really connected with the women as I spoke (through an interpreter).  I talked about what an arduous journey it is to travel half way across the world, but how the thought of that first glimpse of my Thai family, waiting at the airport to receive me, makes any and all discomforts and expense more than worth it.  Oh so worth it.  I compared that to the hope of 2 Corinthians 4:16-18, and the focus we can have, as followers of Jesus, on what it waiting for us at the end of all this journey we call life.

Yes, I'm glad for that great feeling of them laughing at the right places, and nodding in agreement, and otherwise indicating that somehow something was being communicated that seemed somewhat helpful.

But today I am more impressed with what those women have yet again brought to me.  They were more a sermon to me than anything I spoke to them.  With the same point.  Their voices, singing again to us as we left, ring in my mind as a bookmark for keeping a perspective of hope.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Esther remained to teach flute and hang out with the kids.  Apparently enough progress is being made already that a short, simple duet is planned for this coming Sunday service!  It's so much fun watching Esther with the girls.  She's patience and encouraging, and really knows her stuff.

I also asked Esther to hand over my little camera to one of the kids.  I find that I get some pretty good pictures that way.  What follows is the work of Eg and Cheunlung.  :)

Stay tuned for tomorrow's exciting episode:  "Esther Rides An Elephant"

Ponla (Paula) and Cheunlung

Kratae, Cheunlung, Esther, Ponla

Bao and Esther

Cheunlung, Esther, Tonkhao

Just Me and the Pi-Sua

A rather large, black butterfly (pi-sua) just paused on the binder beside me.

I'm sitting at the dinning room table, following a lovely, unhurried two hour meeting with Suradet, Yupa and Boy our translator.  You really can't rush these things when every word is spoken twice, and you need to be all the more sure you've communicated things well.  It really didn't feel like that long, though.  It was a happy, productive time planning for the visit from the Team next March, Day Camp ideas, general conversation about life at Hot Springs, and some deeper heart-sharings between co-laborers.  And we prayed, in both English and Thai.  

Esther has been thoroughly occupied all morning, first teaching her second lesson to very eager students, all girls, who have practiced diligently since yesterday morning, and were apparently ready to take some important next steps.  After that, she left to go back to our room and practice on her own.

I have stayed to go over my notes from the meeting, run through the required 'paths' for my online Greek course, and write this blog post.  That's when the butterfly paid me a visit.

Sometimes it would be easy for me to forget that I am half way around the world.  Other than the fact that I am indeed mindful and missing all the important relationships God has so generously gifted me with in my 'regular life', I find that by now, my 10th visit, I feel so at home here that I forget I'm not.  Until an exotic creature rests on my binder for a breath.

Plans are taking shape as our visit unfolds.  Yesterday's trip into Chiang Mai was very successful.  Canadian dollars were exchanged for baht.  A few various and sundry items were picked up at Big C (think Wallmart on steriods, Asian style).

We dropped in on Bee (Suradet and Yupa's son) at the new, modern mall called Promenada, where he is working to help pay for his education next year.  He's at the information desk and looks quite grown up and important in his suit and tie :).  

Then we hit the Christian bookstore (Dave, Heidi, Megan, remember how last year someone parked on our shoes?) to pick up Bible 'shirts' (covers) for some of the kids who don't have them.  It got fairly hot by the end of the afternoon, and I was regretting my decision not to have a nap and not to turn on the air conditioning.  Thought I could get away with just the fan, but later I was feeling slightly unwell.  Much better after a cold shower and a good sleep (mostly) last night.

For evening devotions tonight we will head over to Yupa's Mom's to worship together and pray for her.  She has apparently had a small stroke but didn't go to the doctor with her initial symptoms.  We will know more after we see her. 

There's talk of riding an elephant, of a market visit, of course, and plans for a party later this week.  Other things have been mentioned, but we'll see what actually unfolds.

Breathless Thanksgiving

We laid low for this, our second day at Hot Springs. 

Sunday had been abundant with worship and conversation over lunch with the three adults who want to be baptized next Sunday.  Hearing their stories and being in awe again of how proactively God intervenes on behalf of those who have nothing, I felt as though I was in the presence of a different kind of royalty.  More on their stories later though.  Esther had her first performance.  I had preached and led evening devotions.  We fell into bed reminded that we'd just traveled half way around the world and were in a completely different time zone.  Slept well, both of us.

Monday was a day off.  Appropriately so, since at home in Canada we'd be eating too much, having a nap, and just chilling with the family.  Exactly what we did, and with great thanksgiving.

I'd brought a ping pong set (inspired by a video Suradet had sent me earlier where there was a string for a net and only one paddle and a book used as the other :) so we watched a mini tournament for a bit.  Then Fruk brought out his magic set and wowed us with his tricks.  Except no one has told him that a magician never reveals his secrets, because at the end of each trick he seemed to take great delight in showing us exactly how it was done!  Both Esther and I were challenged to arm wrestles.  We went on a 'lion hunt'. 

In the flat space provided by the new shelter between the main church building and the conference room, cartwheels and hand stands and various flip over moves can be practiced and shown off.  Wild applause as only a visiting 'gramma'  and 'auntie' can provide.

And on the empty spaces of my notebook, second and third graders can help me with my Thai spelling.  Over the top praise for every effort, as only sweet children eager to encourage my language learning can give.

Guitars were brought out and Esther and Miki and Boy, surrounded by curious littler ones, sang soft songs of worship for about an hour or so. 

We 'helped out' a local business owner by receiving the good gift of a Thai massage at the little shop just down the road.  After that was when the nap happened to us.  Then supper.  Then....

Opening Sponsors' packets at evening worship.  And suddenly it all feels more like Christmas than Thanksgiving.  Except the kids at Hot Springs are tidy in their excitement, pulling each item out with care, exclaiming over treats and gifts, and then gingerly replacing them into the packet before pulling out the next, and exclaiming over that as well.  Prayers for Sponsors.  Oh so grateful.  And then to bed.

Because of the baptisms and because it will give us more time to prepare (and decorate!), the celebration of Thanksgiving Sunday (service) won't happen until next week.  But today..... today felt like Thanksgiving Monday should feel.  Surrounded by loved ones, simply enjoying being together, having fun, being grateful.

I miss my own family and sharing in the gratitude rituals with them, and with my wonderful Highview family as well.  It's odd not to be with them, for sure.  But this was good and deep and beautiful. 

If Thanksgiving is a time to set aside the regular schedules and routines that can distract us from gratitude, to allow us to stop and say thank you, then I was considerably distracted today. 

Being here brings clear focus to what my life is about, and sharp awareness of who I'd be without Jesus. The depth of my gratitude for God's goodness and sovereignty and delicate love makes it hard, at times, for me to breathe.

Random Acts of God-ness

As we settle into our first day at Hot Springs, I'd actually like to tell a story that happened on the trip over.

It was on the first, long flight from Toronto to Seoul.  Both Esther and I had aisle seats, which is exactly the way to go for the endurance flights.  Means you can get up and move around any time you want.  It also means that each of us had 'other' seatmates.

On my side of things, I was traveling with two stunning, well dressed Korean women who were friends with each other.  We got along fine, but they mostly kept to themselves, slept a lot (more than me, I was jealous) and apologized profusely any time they wanted to get up.

It wasn't until the very last hour of that flight that I actually had a conversation with either.  It was with the woman who had the window seat.  She was standing in the aisle to stretch, like me, and we began to chat.  The first topic of co-travelers always leads with inquiries as to respective destinations, and so I found out that she was on her way home for some surgery so she could return to Toronto and continue her studies.  Asking further, I found out that not only was she studying theology, but she was a student at Tyndale Seminary, just like me!

Immediately the conversation moved into high gear, comparing programs, professors we had in common, and a little bit about what God was doing in our lives.  At this point we exchanged first names, and Meeching asked me about our destination.  She was very excited to hear Suradet and Yupa's story, about how God was reclaiming young lives in Thailand, and about Highview's strong connection, relationally and spiritually.

Then we sat down again and the conversation ended in the midst of the 'we're almost there' tidying ritual of the attendants.  But then Meeching reached over her friend to touch my arm. With a sincere face she told me that she felt God would have her give something toward the care of the children at Hot Springs.  And she handed me a single piece of paper money.  It was dark, and I couldn't tell at first exactly how much it was for.  But then I held it up closer to the screen and saw she'd handed me a US $100 bill.

This she gave freely to a stranger.  

I pray all the time that God would provide for the needs of our kids.  Our Sponsors are a HUGE part of that, for sure.  And the various times we've raised funds for specific needs, that's been phenomenal as well.  But to have this much just handed over to me at random like this?

I thanked her so much, over and again.  Promised it would get straight into Suradet and Yupa's hands.  Tucked it away into my wallet.  I couldn't wait to give it to them and tell the story.

Which I did, in the car on the way to Hot Springs from the airport.  Prajao di - God is good - in so many wild and random ways like this.

And I can't help thinking that this is only the first of many surprises God has in store for both Esther and myself this time out.

Esther, by the way, is a pro traveler, has a strong and positive disposition, and is embracing this experience fully.  Her first flute performance was this morning at the Sunday service, and both her poise and servant's heart served the dear people of Hot Springs well.

Stay tuned for more.   Especially pictures.  Just tried to include some here, but I have to figure something out on my phone first :P. 

Lifting Sails

It's totally crazy how stuff clusters.

The fall began more or less as I expected, and in happy rhythms of Sabbath, giving way to pressing into work, giving way to Sabbath again.  Times outside, by the pond or on the patio, helped elongate summer's restorative benefits, even as the pace picked up and seasonal events unfolded.  Life and people seemed at ease with one another.  Community purred.  All was good.

Then, beginning about two weeks ago, the first little ruffle seemed to let in a series of random and unrelated gusts of unhappy surprises, not unheard of in my 'line of work', but unusually clustered and all coming out of left field.  Each difficulty took me completely by surprise.  I would leave the conversation, or finish the email and say to myself, "I didn't see that coming."

Like I said, it's random and unrelated, each situation oblivious to any of the others.  But, almost every other day since it started, there's been one unhappy surprise after another; one surge of adrenaline, or dip of sadness, or even rise of anger after another requiring the disciplines that keep me centered and calm.

Perhaps not-so-randomly, I recently received my special edition of Steve Bell's 25th anniversary collection entitled "Pilgrimage".  Amongst its generous offerings is a guitar and voice only rendition of the traditional hymn "I Feel the Winds of God Today."  Love it.

It's simplicity and honesty has encouraged me.  The strength of the resolve to say with conviction, "today my sails I lift" when you know there is drenching spray ahead....  I find I am braver because of the gentle melody and gutsy lyric that sets me back to sea.

I include the lyrics here, in case anyone is in need of some grit to lift the sails this day. 

And it's with joy and deep gratitude that I realize the abundance of my life, the loyalty of friends, and the anticipation of visiting my Thai family starting in just a few days. 

I Feel the Winds of God Today (Kingsfold)
Music: Traditional, Lyric by Jesse Adams – public domain

I feel the winds of God today
Today my sail I lift
Though heavy oft with drenching spray
And torn with many a rift

If hope would light the water’s crest
And Christ my bark will use
I’ll seek the seas at His behest
And brave another cruise

It is the wind of God that dries
My vain regretful tears
Until with braver thoughts shall rise
The purer brighter years

If cast on shores of selfish ease
Or pleasure I should be
Lord let me feel Your freshening breeze
And I’ll set back to sea

If ever I forget Thy love
Or how that love was shown
Lift high the blood-red flag above
It bears Thy name alone

Great Pilot of my onward way
Thou will not let me drift
I feel the winds of God today
Today my sail I lift

[I wish I could offer a link so you could actually listen to the song if you wanted, but I can't seem to find one.  So, if anyone finds one and wants to post it in the comments, or email me, I'll include it at a later date.]