Led by Love

"Become the kind of leader that people

would follow voluntarily,

even if you had no title or position."

Brian Tracy

I realized the other day that it's been a full twenty years, as of October 31st to be precise, that I stepped into a new intensity of leadership.  

I guess it could be said that I've been leading things since I was 16, when I took on my first Sunday School class.  I've had lots of opportunities given me as I moved into my twenties, and on into other adult roles, where it was my job to organize and inspire a group of folks to get something done.  I was intentionally mentored in these various roles, and am eternally grateful for all that has been poured into me, especially the "risks" taken by the men who were at the time my only role models at a time when cross gender mentoring was frowned upon.  Thank you, all of you.

So, leadership, doing it well, thinking it through, living it out had been part of my experience for decades already.

But it wasn't until I was asked to accept a solo pastor role, something I actually had never aspired to by the way, that I felt the full weight of leadership press upon my spirit.  During that time I read all the books, went to all the seminars, watched all the You Tube videos, took all the courses.  I needed and wanted to learn how to be the best leader I could possibly be, and applied all the energy of my Type A perfectionist temperament, and my at-the-time raging insecurities to the task.

Not long into that era of my life, only three years later, the Lord, by His great grace and lavish love, allowed me the unbelievable honour of partnering with two of His servants half way around the world, who would ultimately shape my leadership in ways nothing from my own culture could.

In fact, it was being upended and disoriented by culture shock in those first few visits to Hot Springs that forced me to learn leadership all over again.  But now/again, from the perspective of the learner, the follower.  I was in 'totally-other' territory, completely incapacitated by a language and customs I didn't understand.  And it was the best thing to ever happen to me.  If for no other reason than it soon crucified any notions that I was there to messiah anything.  There's something about having your heart dismantled that knocks the better part of any white saviour complex right out of you.  (I say 'the better part' because that insidious stuff tends to cling inside a soul, requiring frequent visits to the humility department, just saying.)

2008

I have learned so much about leadership by observing, following, listening to, imitating two of the most spectacular human beings ever placed on the planet:  Ajahn Suradet and Ajahn Yupa.   These are their formal titles, and I use them with respect.  But the truth is, I would gladly follow their lead voluntarily, not because of titles, or dynamic personalities, or impressive curriculum vitae, but just because of who they are and how they love.

A lot of western leadership books don't usually talk about love.  It can be more about strategy, and making hard decisions, and gathering the 'right' people around you, and being tough. and 'having what it takes' (whatever that means).  And most of that, yes, are bits of it.  (Some of the literature now, the understanding of it now, is indeed leaning more the the 'soft skills' of leadership.  And yay for that.)

But if you don't love the people God's given you to lead, then, really, what are you?  A boss maybe.  A manager maybe.  A chief or senior something maybe.  Maybe even a teacher, which is fine.  But a leader?

Here, I have been loved well and then, by default, led well.   And, in turn, I have sought to be ever increasing in my capacity to love, and let the Spirit lay down whatever leadership comes from that.  I can only hope it's made a difference somewhere to someone.

And this is how I've been led by love.  This is what I have been given as a by product of the astounding partnership God has forged here.  I am not, and will never be the same.  

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I make no apology for gushing sentiments.  It would be utterly wrong for me not to acknowledge this great debt of gratitude I will never be able to repay.

Remembering Gary Nelson

 Your statutes are my heritage forever;

they are the joy of my heart.

My heart is set on keeping your decrees

to the very end.

Psalm 119:111-112

With a very keen sense of loss, I learned just yesterday of the passing of former President of Tyndale University and Seminary, Gary Nelson on Monday, January 22, 2024.

Like many of his students I imagine, this feels personal.  Despite the formal title of The Reverend Doctor Gary V. Nelson, a status his life achievements well deserved, most of us were invited to simply call him Gary, welcomed into the hospitality of his warmth, and wit, and genuine interest in others.

He was often seen just strolling through the hallways, always fully present with whomever stopped him to chat, myself included.  He seemed to know everyone's name.

The one credit I had with him called Gospel, Church and Culture, remains key in how I approach the relevant integration of my faith into the Canadian landscape.  

Any other time I had the privilege of hearing him speak or preach, he never failed to bring an honesty and realism to what it means to be a follower of Jesus in the ordinary, daily context of life.  

Although he had many heavy responsibilities, and was well sought after across the country, he graciously accepted offers to come speak to lesser known groups of Christian leaders and congregations, having a special affinity for the smaller church.  Highview benefitted from his teaching and presence when he came as a guest speaker a few years back.  Our people still quote him from time to time.

So this morning I am in that space of sadness and gratitude.  

It is an honour to have been influenced by the humility and grace of this intelligent teacher and leader.  

I will remember our conversations fondly.

Prayers for his wife, family and the Tyndale community, and all who will feel this loss.