Falling Forward

"Restrain your voice from weeping
and your eyes from tears.
For your work will be rewarded,
declares the LORD.
They will return from the land of the enemy.
so there is hope for your future,
declares the LORD.
Your children will return to their own land."
Jeremiah 31:16-17

I spent the day with papers all over my desk, binders opened on top of each other, my computer screen layered with windows. It was an ordered chaos of strategic planning and visioneering, as interwoven and interdependent as the papers and binders and windows themselves, each element resting with delicate precision on the life and intentions of the other, in order to manifest in the vibrancy of another ministry season at Highview.

I love this time of year. It's when we get to set it all up, like a giant connection of dominoes, or a childhood game of Mousetrap. This is the careful, thoughtful part, where the ideas and conversations and prayers of last season have morphed into the building blocks of this season, and are now being set up, piece by piece according to the plan, ready for go.

In just a few weeks, some master gong of convention will sound off the beginning of this particular season, and the first domino will nudge, the ball is released, and the rest all falls into line. Fast and furious, it will seem by the end of it, but wild and wonderful and unpredictably predictable while it runs, with constant rapt attention while we watch to see if it all works like we hoped it would.

I love it, because it points us forward. Dominoes only fall one way. Forward. The ball only rolls one way. Forward.

It's a gift, this forward motion. Like gravity. It keeps us where we are supposed to be. Eyes intent on where it's heading.

Although.

It's not quite so clear where it's all going. We can plan it, we can set it up. But there's this randomness to our human experience in this post-fall, pre-heaven interim. There's an unexplainable Wild Holiness that engages dynamically without consulting us. I know. He does. He has.

So.

I am wild with hope this time around. And thoroughly surprised by the joy of it again.

Happy Birthday Mom!

For my Mom, who turns 82 today.

I celebrate you, Mom, for your life and legacy.
For always believing the best of me, and being a strong voice in my childhood for the strength in each of us.
For knowing and using your spiritual gifts of Faith and Giving, even without ever having attended any seminar on the matter.
For delighting the simplest of things and teaching me that there is joy in ever day if you look for it.
For demonstrating tenacity and loyalty in an age of convenience and self-servitude.
For showing me that it is possible to live a life in which there is no bad word for any human being.
For giving generously to global initiatives, long before that was the "new cool" thing to do.
For telling me about Jesus and being there when I gave my heart to Him.

I hope our ride in the country today, the only thing you've asked for your birthday, brings you joy and fills your soul.

I love you Mom.

Ruth Anne

A Severe Mercy

For you O God, tested us; you refined us like silver. You brought us into prison and laid burdens on our back. You let men ride over our heads; we went through fire and water, but you brought us to a place of abundance.

Psalm 66:10-12

Hold me together, Yahweh
Let it never be said that I trusted in vain
It's Your reputation that makes me outrageously brave.

Hold out Your mercy to me
Go ahead and correct me for the sake of Your name.
It's not much of a threat but my hoping is keeping me sane,
Again and again.

In Your love remember me.

Steve Bell

Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees.
Make level paths for your feet,
so that the lame may not be disabled,
but rather healed. Hebrews 12:12-13

Though you were ruined and made desolate
and your land laid waste,
now you will be too small for your people,
and those who devoured you will be far away.
The children born during your bereavement
will yet say in your hearing,
'This place is too small for us;
give us more space to live in.'
Then you will say in your heart,
'Who bore me these?
I was bereaved and barren:
I was exiled and rejected.
Who brought these up?
I was left all alone,
but these -- where have they come form?'

Isaiah 49:19-21

Morning by morning, I wake up to find
The strength and the comfort of God's hand in mine
Season by season I watch Him amazed,
In awe of the mystery of His perfect ways,
All I have need of, His hand will provide
He's always been faithful to me.

Carolyn Ahrens

In repentance and rest is your salvation.
In quietness and trust is your strength.

Isaiah 30:15

Only with You, Abba.
Only You.
Else all is lost.

RAB09