See?

 

There's something so humbling about this moment for me.  Every time.

It's the farewell prayer on the last night before leaving.  

It's at the end of evening worship.  We've sung the last songs, read the last books, and recited Colossians 3:17 for the last time...for now.  I've wrapped up our last lesson about "In Style With Jesus."  [On this particular night we had a ridiculously silly fashion show, wearing all the items given out for each lesson.  That's what all the bandanas and such are about.]   And I've told them how much I love them.  Told them to never forget it.

That's when I'm invited to sit on a chair, and they come and lay hands.  Gentle little fingertips, and two of them have taken one of my hands to hold.  They all pray together out loud, like a mystic murmuring that wraps around me and upward in a wispy multicoloured ribbon of promise and unconditional love.  

I receive it openly.  And each time I hear the Father say, "See?  Here it is. The desire of your heart."  And all those moments in the past when I felt useless, and unworthy, and not enough, and forgotten, and misunderstood, and accused are all revealed for their folly.  Every promise to 'work all things out for good' is made solid.  And I get the sense that should the Lord choose that singular moment to take me, I would wake up in the presence of God, totally surrounded by love and peace, and not feel any different.

My bags are all packed and weighed all but what can't be done until you brush your teeth for the last time and walk out the door.  Breakfast first.  Then a last wave goodbye to the kids on their way to school.  Then I'll sneak back into the meeting room and hide 'ganoms' (treats) on the bookshelves for them to find tonight.  Then off to the airport around 8 a.m. my time.

Expectations are to arrive in Toronto at around 9:30 p.m.  I will have been travelling for more than 24 hours, but we chase the sun back, and regain the 12 hours we lost on the way here.

I am eager to be back with my beloved husband and all the other loves God has so richly granted me in Canada.  AND my heart aches with the human limitation of only being able to be in one place at one time.

As always, I cannot adequately express my gratitude for how well taken care of I've been while here, and for the deep respect I have for Suradet and Yupa and all they so generously offer to the plans and purposes of God in this place.

And also, my deep, deep thanks to all those who support my being here in so many ways; not the least of which is my own husband and family, but also all those who contribute to my Missionary in Residence stiped so faithfully each month, and anyone who takes on just a little more work and responsibility to cover my absence in big and small ways.

I'll do my usual Facebook posts along the way, letting everyone know my progress.  First stop, Taipei.  Then the long flight to Toronto.  I have myself a pretty decent seat, if I do say so myself.  Aisle, near the back, close to bathrooms and a little bit of extra aisle space to stretch in.  And I have  LOT of pictures to sort, so there's that.

Grateful.

On my way.